Iconoclastically yours!

Are we all flying over the cukoo’s nest?

Iconoclasticallly yours by www.iconoclasticallyyours.com is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 United States License

This morning, I miss Zeus. I miss his chocolate loving eyes, the wisdom of his face, the staccato of his tail greeting the new day to come. He had been a fixture in my life for so long, that even now, a year later, yes, I do miss him! Are you calling me crazy? You have to wait…. Don’t drool yet, and yes, after that, you will be able to call me crazy.

Breaking news: I am alive and well. Jessica’s Golden Retriever is alive and well too!

I just couldn’t write. You know, you should never give me so many topics to talk about. My brain couldn’t just take it! Right now, it is still asking for a break, people! I mean it!

The infamous manicure that Mel Gibson provided to Lindsay Lohan…. Hey, get real, he needs a job! He needed one before, since I have been boycotting him for some time now. It was not that difficult since he has a way to provide thousands of gallons of hemoglobin in his movies, just not my thing! And to tell you the truth, I really don’t give a crap about Gibson. The guy is sick, look at his eyes. As I am writing this, he is already flying over a Cuckoo’s Nest, so get ready for the landing! It is going to be far worst than the earthquake we had in DC a few days ago. The good thing about this earthquake was that for one day, we could blame everything on it! My poorly manicured nails…. Blame it on the earthquake! Jackson destroying the last sponge in my house…. Earthquake baby! The BP spill…. Are you freaking kidding? No way!

But while I am at the BP spill, what is that craziness around DC and the desperate Republicans going after our President because he took a weekend off (I have news for the morons who are so frustrated by his 48 hours in Maine! He is still the President, even there, and still working, yes, even when he licks that ice cream!). I am so tired of these people who say they love America but can’t stand Americans. What do you expect from him? That he goes to the Gulf with a straw and spends his time sucking out the oil from the Gulf? Or better, why can’t our president twitch his nose like Samantha and ooppppsss we go back to the US before the George/Dick’s mess? How about that one?

Republicans have to be desperate? When you see that blonde woman, who looks like Ann Coulter’s twin, with her new book, being so upset about Michelle Obama and her arms, and her fight against obesity. I know, I know, it’s a lost cause, as lost as the guns thing but at least she is trying! I do prefer Michelle and her fitness fight that Laura and her librarian look at the world. I do agree with the blonde bimbo though that the parents should do the job. Get the junk food out of your house, kick your kids out of the couch, and make them move! But in these days, parents have a tendency to forget the meaning of parenting. It is so easy to just let go, and stuff your kids with an ice cream to make them quiet, the same way they put the pacifier in the baby’s mouth! I still don’t get it, the pacifier thing. My kids never had one. Babies look stupid with those and what’s the point? When the pacifier falls, they scream, so sorry but I never wanted the position of pacifier concierge! No, thank you!

I am just exhausted looking back at these last weeks…. No, I won’t forget the Russian spies who must have flunk Spy school. What kind of spy leaves Post-it notes with their passwords by their computers? Even I, don’t do this! OK, I don’t have much imagination for passwords, so they are easy to find but still! I do not write them on Post-its, just on my address book at the P section!

And then, there was Pouch, my old guy who has been diagnosed with leukemia, still not sure which one, but looking at him, it has to be the chronic one. We’ll know that for sure in a week, but one of the hardest moments was to start giving him those three little red pills called Leukeran. It’s chemotherapy, and the first time I had to give them to him, he had a taste of my tears mixed with some cream cheese and the pills. You see, you look at him, and he is normal – I mean as normal as he has ever been -, and I knew that those pills even if they were the right thing since they are aggressive little ones and are going after the cancer cells, the meaning of giving them was heart wrenching for me. It felt like there was the old Pouch, and then the new one with the red pills going after the beast. It was an acknowledgement of his illness, and it was just a tough moment.

He has no side effects of that chemo, he is just good old Pouch. The funny thing though, is that I knew it was most likely the drug which was going to be prescribed to him – thanks to the net and my multiple researches! I am getting real good at it. I should be able in a few months to enter any Chronic Lymphocytic K9 Leukemia contest. I bet I will have most of the answers right! So, before he was prescribed those, I went on the net to find out the cost of it. They are used on humans as well, and there came the big Mystery! A well known online pharmacy selling Leukeran had a special: you buy 30 Leukeran pills and you get 4 free Viagra pills. Up to this minute, if someone can explain to me, how when you get into chemotherapy, you will want Viagra at the same time??? Guys, I need some kind of explanation there, because I just don’t get it!

To resume the situation, if you mix together: earthquake + Russian Spies – Gibson/Lohan team + Leukeran – Viagra, there is no more time to tell you why my mother would think that I am getting crazier by the minute! Maybe in my next column!

Iconoclastically yours,

Dominique